Wrestling with Eisav’s Angel in Our Times2 min read

In the beginning of this week’s parsha, Yaakov Avinu wrestles with his brother’s ministering angel until daybreak before meeting with Eisav himself. Reb Shlomo Carlebach reveals the inner dimension of this struggle.

Eisav’s overarching challenge to Yaakov is that while his avodas Hashem may look good on the surface, it is ultimately standing on a weak foundation and does not represent his deepest truth. This point is expressed in a few ways in the episodes of Yaakov’s encounter with both Eisav and his ministering angel.

Eisav’s angel attacks Yaakov when he is alone; “Vayevasair Yaakov levado.” He uses this context to imply that Yaakov’s avodas Hashem is merely founded upon a host of external circumstances which range from societal expectations to promise of reward in the world to come. Left alone, he claims, without any external force, Yaakov doesn’t truly want to serve Hashem or live his life in alignment with the divine will. It is only an external mask, a fraud, a facade.

Chazal teach that the dust from Yaakov’s struggle with Eisav’s angel reached the Kisei HaKavod. While dirt enables a seed to take root and grow, it is impossible to plant anything in dust. Eisav is telling Yaakov, “Because your avodas Hashem isn’t truly connected to your essence, it has never, and will never, bear fruit.”

Yaakov’s response to this attack, and the response of every Jew throughout history who struggles with the internal voice of the sar shel Eisav at all times, is to stand firm and defiant in our knowledge that our face is ever etched on the Kisei hakavod. Try as he may to obscure this truth with the dust of his attack, Eisav can never negate this fact – avodas Hashem sits at the very core of our being. Sure, there is a wide expanse between the “facade” of our Jewishness in this world and the shining face of our true holiness etched onto the Kisei HaKavod in which we frolic and oftentimes lose ourselves to the notion that, “left alone”, we don’t truly desire avodas Hashem. But it is our responsibility to constantly cry out to Hashem as the tzaddikim teach that Yaakov did: “Hatzileini miyad achi, miyad Eisav”; “Hashem, please save me from thinking that, in truth, Eisav is my brother, my friend, and that deep down I wish I could be free from serving You – his kiss is his bite! This is not what I truly desire! Please allow me to dig beyond Eisav’s challenge to the “emmesser emes”, the truth beyond all truth: my commitment to You and Your will sits at the deepest core of my identity.